What the heck is a blog?

Things that made me happy this week

2010-09-30T14:19:00.001-05:00

Sun flowers from Jen- for no reason at all

A bottle of wine from Kenzie- just because- and it's bound to make me even more happy when I open it ;)

A yard filled with yellow leaves- dreadful but beautiful all at the same time. My attempts at mowing before I ever have to rake- well...errr... an A for effort, a C for progress considering the trees have dropped very few of the entire load and I am 5 huge bags in and 3 solid days of mowing.

A little boy who can almost smile on que

A deck cluttered with too many toys and too many leaves- but none the less still warm enough to sit on

Enough tree carnage for one more fire- a dozen more roasted marshmallows and that fire smell :)

So I was thinking about the Duggars'...

2010-09-30T01:22:00.002-05:00

Well I was-

I absolutely LOVE and adore the Duggars'. I adore their ultra strict values and oh so Christian views and despite the fact that the don't believe in dinosaurs- I still respect them.

But all their Duggarly quirks aside

19 kids

All beautiful

All healthy

Not one of them is overweight

Not one of them is handicapped or suffers from autism

All respectful

I think it's about time they start selling fertilized Jim Bob and Michelle eggs....who needs real estate and a TV show when you could market the PERFECT FAMILY

Why Blog?

2010-09-30T00:59:00.000-05:00

Sometimes my lack of doing everything that I could and should accomplish is disappointing. I realize that although this blog was a hobby- I never thought that in years I could look back and see Hailey grow - see a stay at home mom turn photographer- see a building superintendent turn into a home owner- see a mom of one become a mom of two.

I have never been good at keeping things straight. My mom had boxes of keepsakes- baby teeth, first outfits, books of school day treasures packed neatly into closets. I haven't been so diligent- but without even knowing it I left a tad of a record in my ramblings. And so that's why it's been my intention to keep at it.

And so now to complain (make excuses I suppose) Every year I have been lucky enough to nearly double my workload. This year, has been especially hard. Ryan is attached to me "at the hip" He is also very smart for a boy that mutters a only 10 or so words. He knows if my clothing attire looks like I may be stepping out for a meeting. He is Ryan, a touch of a "bad seed" in a soft creamy white cute body. He is Ryan, a boy.

And so to recap Ryan at 20 months- for my record

At just over a year Ryan had a full set of teeth. I wish I could use that as the excuse of his demeanor- no luck- there is still often a night when he wakes up- only recently does he say "bubba" to which I respond by tiredly trudging into the kitchen to snatch him one.

He is a bit tiresome. He likes boy things. Mostly the things that allow hitting, slamming and noise making. He seems to take joy in hitting things with sticks, spoons, rattles (which may or may not include people). He smiles if he can see that this noise or jolt from such a hit bothers someone. Oh Ryan.

For a long time he has said, Mom, Dada, Nana, a baby version of Hailey, car, dark out(sounds like dart ow), out, eyes, hot, shoes...

More recently, bubba, grass, lawn mower (his favorite thing), baby, toes, high chair, grandpa.

He was born to "work" he loves cleaning, vacuuming, yard work, floor washing, laundry....he would rather do any of those things above toys any day. I feel like if he could talk, he would ask me when he could do these things "for real".

He is oh so miserable though. He wakes up from every sleep in tears. He wants me to be availiable to snuggle him for a half hour after each nap while he pulls at my hair (he has a complete hair infatuation, when I carry him in store he pulls at the ends- there is nothing better he would like to do then have his bottle and run the ends through his fingers) He is sensitive and already doesn't like rules.

But he is also funny- he knows when he can make someone laugh by making a funny face or doing something silly and will do so to entertain.

I will leave you with the thought of the process of getting Ryan inside after a period of any outdoor time. It is like a stealth mission. You have to creep behind him and scoop him (mostly carrying him like a sack of potatoes to avoid his teeth (I forgot to write about his biting phase- which may or may not be over) At which point he uses all of his force to wiggle from your arms. Once inside he "yells" his eyebrows are frowned and he hangs by the front door in a complete mess. Good thing he is so effn cute

I'm Back

2010-09-29T01:08:00.001-05:00

Are you ready for this?

Some Photographs

2010-02-28T09:11:00.002-06:00

There is a photographer in the Winnipeg area that I adore- I relish at photos on a blog where the soft boxes reflect in little eyes...

I wanted to take my children for photos there

Yes

Even though I could just rustle them into my basement and take some head shots, I wanted to go and see this particular photographer

But, there of course is the expense

and I was ready to throw my "money caution" to the wind

What's 75.00 dollar sitting fee (reasonable in this market!) and although I couldn't bare to buy a digital package, I could certainly spend 150.00 on prints. 225.00 for a session with memories to last a lifetime....

And then

I was reminded by a friend that most of these photographers have a certain pet peeve. People who come in, pay a sitting fee, and then order only a handful of prints. AND EVEN THOUGH the profit margin on these prints is nearly 100 percent- 100 PERCENT and I know that they are paying less then 10 dollars on these prints that I am paying oodles for- I (Carrie Ekosky) would be a pet peeve. Mostly because I wasn't ordering 20x30 mounted prints or paying 400.00 for digital files...

I'm sorry

But there is something wrong with this "picture"

and this is why this industry sucks

and why I have a philosophy that I find so hard to change

And now I'm just annoyed

and

would

rather

give

225.00

Sears!

The Haps

2010-02-16T15:07:00.006-06:00

Nicole said I should write something

I told her that I didn't have a thing to write about

she told me even when I write about nothing it's still good

So I am left trying to think of a way to capture in words the hum-drum of life in absurd temperatures, where the highlight of my "nightlife" might be a movie- but more realistically, 15 minutes of you-tube and a Les Stroud special....

So what is going on....

26 days until our trip out west- I am starting to worry- more so about Ryan and how he will adjust to life in a predominately seniors condominium on the ocean- "wealthy seniors" who probably have the moola to have us "rubbed out" if Ryan pulls his wake up at 2 am and cry game.

Ryan now dances- he prefers the hip hop beat of the awful radio hits like "Miami Trick" and "I know you want me" but will settle for some Beyonce. On another note, I have finally purchased him a pair of shoes (have I mentioned that we rarely venture out...no need for shoes when you don't rarely leave the main floor of your home right?)

I have been doing crazy amount of portraits (maternity, newborn and even some "icy" outdoor engagements) and I have also had a few consultations which have been ultimately successful- this year is gearing up to me almost too busy :)

Hailey is hooked on facebook- farmville- and facebook chat- Jeff teases that a girl she chats with (Mary) is actually Barry- I can see it now- "I'm Chris Hanson from Dateline NBC- have a seat"

And if you are looking for something to read, check out these blogs

65 Red Roses
Sheye Rosemeyer
Shifting Life
Prairie Daze

I know not one of these women personally, but amazing reads none the less....

If only he were as good at putting them in- as taking them out!

2010-02-16T15:04:00.001-06:00

ONE

2010-01-20T22:41:00.005-06:00

It really escapes me where the time has gone

Tomorrow will mark one whole year- I wanted this year to pass quickly but didn't imagine that in a blink we would get here.

And so I have Ryan. It's hard to believe that for one full year we have shared a bed every night. It's even harder to fathom the amounts of nights that I have been awoken on more than one time to fetch a "bubba" or pat his bum. It has been a good year of getting to know each other.

He has emerged

He walks, he plays, he has 9 teeth. He can point out eyes, hair, tongue, toes, belly button and our favorite (his unmentionables) He knows when people are coming up the deck and waits for the door to open, he waves bye and hi and says (haiiii) as he waves. He smiles a lot- but also cries at the slightest fall (ohhh the drama) unlike Hailey who would have trucked along, he doesn't like to fall- he is far from a tough cookie. Unlike Hailey as a baby, he has tested my abilities in worry. He has an allergy to cow's milk that initially made him very sick- but one year (and some expensive formula later) he is healthy and big. We have already experienced a trip to the emergency room- an ear infection through a night-

Also unlike Hailey, I have spent some nights "up' with a baby who thinks that 3:00 am is a good time to get up- thankfully that isn't a norm... But best (and unlike a baby Hailey) he gives the best hugs already- big and loving- and meant to be.

One whole year

And yet not one of his photos graces our walls yet

It really does fly

Hailey calls Ryan "The best thing that has ever happened to her"

He is our Ryan

He is one.

If you think cleaning his face after supper is a challenge

2010-01-03T14:19:00.003-06:00

Try cleaning this!

And I always use a warm, wet, soft cloth

But he cries- like you never heard a baby cry-

But mostly I posted this photo to gross my mother out

Nothing Says trimming the tree like....

2010-01-03T14:17:00.001-06:00

Truthfully, I wasn't sad to pack up this and every other ornament and pack them away until next year.... :)

The Things People Try To Sell

2009-12-27T15:50:00.002-06:00

As seen on Used Winnipeg today....

Price
$5
Description
Boys, size 6, adjustable in 3 places, suede. Excellent condition. Maples / Tyndall Park / North End

Excellent Condition?

5 dollars?

Huh?

Who's gonna clean up this heap...

2009-12-26T13:32:00.003-06:00

of toys

of crap

of wrap

of cardboard

of plastic twist ties fastening toys in neat little packages

of bits of tape that stick on your socks

of clothes with NO drawer space for

OH- ME? You don't say :S

Ode to a Christmas Eve

2009-12-24T00:28:00.002-06:00

Am I ready for Christmas...heck no! I will have to wait until the morning to pick up the "lasts" of all that I need. This year, I found it incredibly difficult to get things done *sigh* I will be happy when it's all over.

It's a quiet Christmas Eve- well "just barely" right now- one half hour in, the kids are sleeping, Jeff is out- facebook is "alive" with farmville gifts to open, photos of gingerbread houses, well wishes for the holidays... (don't judge- I am a stay at home Mom lacking editing right now) Chances are if you are a "blog reader" you are probably a "facebook junkie" as well so you probably understand.

On another note- since Facebook changed the privacy settings, there was an account that I came on by chance today that wasn't the typical shut down profile of an "old" friend. It was nice to "catch up" on the ongoings- I always wonder how people are- how their kids look- how life has treated them. It made me happy but now I find myself a little glum- You don't miss what you can't see...

And so on to another holiday season- A job...done as Peterman would say. An excuse to eat unthinkable amounts of baking and little fatty finger foods. An excuse to spoil the kids rotten.

Merry Christmas

Crusty Face

2009-12-20T23:48:00.002-06:00

This is a man who "prefers" that I not wipe his face- so if you have come to the door and seen my baby looking rather crusty lately- please know that I would really rather him be sparkling fresh, but I'm not really willing to fight him for it. And sometimes the boogies pile up until bath time- and most times we are on our 3rd shirt of the day- sometimes even the pants don't make it past the first meal- or my floors - and most certainly not the high chair...

The joys of being almost one

Shut Out

2009-12-20T15:39:00.002-06:00

Do you feel sorry for him?

This is a frequent scene- Ryan- outside Hailey's door- waiting for the chance to get in. Because when you have a big sister, there are so many fun and exciting things to do. The carpet is purple and squashy and the piano- oh he loves that keyboard- he starts the demo song and plunks away on those ivories- so much fun...

Instead- he waits- shut out- looking sad- wondering WHY?

But don't feel bad- because Hailey probably did and let him in- and he pretends to love that keyboard but he's *oh so* easily distracted by the white board markers, drawers to open, computers to touch and when he doesn't get his way...

Booked

2009-12-16T13:20:00.004-06:00

First Class Sleeping Car Train Fare: 1,539.00 usd

Travel to Grand Forks to get on train: 75 dollars

Enhanced Licenses' to cross the border: 60 dollars

Buying Entertainment to bring on Train: 50 dollars

Spending 60 hours on a train with an 8 year old, 14 month old and a jerk: Priceless

On Tiger Woods...

2009-12-15T22:07:00.002-06:00

It doesn't matter if you make 40 thousand dollars a year or 5 billion dollars a year- when you are a cheatin' loser dirt bag man the text messages and emails are almost exactly the same.

Wake Up And Smell The Coffee

2009-11-04T11:35:00.003-06:00

The prospect this morning that I could "maybe" smell a waft of my baby's dirty diaper was exciting.
Yes exciting
I have lost three of my senses with this cold that I have
smell
taste
hearing

I have been without taste and smell for about and week and a half- I DON'T SMELL A THING- I DON'T TASTE A THING. It is one of the most oddest experiences. How many times this week I have thought..."what a shame, all this Halloween Candy and not one taste bud to enjoy them with". And funnier, at first I would eat them anyway- it took me an entire day to "give up" What would be the point? Whether it yogurt or Ice cream? Chicken noodle or vegetable? It doesn't matter.
Which makes not eating junk a NON- FACTOR. Why would I put sugar on my Rice Crispies? Why even eat the Cinnamon Toast Crunch- seems like a waste of some tasty stuff?
And I am a compulsive junk loving eater
Which got me thinking....
With all the weight loss drugs...weight loss surgeries...why? why? why? has not one big pharma company came up with the drug to completely turn off your taste buds? Seems simple. There are drugs to lower your blood pressure, thin your blood, lift your spirits...
I think it would work
It took me maybe one or two days to give up the junk- no taste for it- no taste for anything really. So maybe a month of a morbidly obese junk loving body to do the same?

Living without smell is almost as bad. Shampoo, soap, poopy diapers, the outside, the inside...nothing! Not one smell. Not even after I blow my nose, used nasal spray, and/ or decongestants. I have tried it all. Heaven forbid the house be burning down, it would be unlikely that I would smell it.

The loss of hearing in one of my ears due to a terrible ear infection is incredibly annoying and has been very nauseating. I took for granted the benefits of two working ears. I feel some days like I have vertigo- dizzy and dis-orientated. It sucks

And I haven't even touched on the kids. Ryan with a sinus infection, Hailey sporting scarlet fever...

But alas we are on the mend.

Gotta love the change of seasons

Super Baby and the Mad Scientist

2009-10-31T22:52:00.001-05:00

Theeeey're Back

2009-10-31T22:43:00.003-05:00

Not a poltergeist ;) Four Square! This wonderful 15 minutes of "mommy Freedom" has the pvr set to record them all! Ryan absolutely loves them.

9 months

2009-10-31T22:35:00.003-05:00

And quite the fiasco to capture a portrait! His "October" hat fell apart in the wash and I settled for one that I recycled from months ago. Ryan was much more interested in leaves and sticks. Hailey had better things to do and despite my best efforts to sing four square and chant wildly- I was no match for the great outdoors. Maybe I will have better luck next time!

And the picture below is for my mom- and she'll know why :)

Back By Popular Demand

2009-10-23T23:10:00.002-05:00

OK- not "popular" demand- but demand anyhow :)

Things have been busy.
I'm not going to lie- running a business, a house, a yard and a couple kids really has left me with only enough time to devote religiously to facebook ;)

But tomorrow marks my second last wedding of the year! And in two more weeks my final wedding of the season. I DON'T want to jinx it by saying "I did it" "I did it!" One solid season complete with a newborn, tween and lazy spouse! And all and all I didn't let too much slip (okay I look like hell and still have 20 pounds to loose) but the house is still standing, the baby is thriving and the editing is almost wrapped. Success? I suppose it is.

I have a lot to complain about. A month of photos to post. A trip in the plans I want to write about. Thoughts about the future to share.

So just when you thought you had me back, this post is a wrap. I have a camera needing to be packed away for tomorrow and a bed that's calling....

8 months!

2009-09-24T22:08:00.002-05:00

Sometimes I say that you are for sale.

And then some nights, like last night, you are so good and sleep like a log (a rolling, moving, kicking log) and I decide I might just want to keep you around!

Either way, you take a good photo.

Ha!

2009-09-16T22:38:00.001-05:00

Splash

2009-09-15T13:49:00.002-05:00

So I was doing some thinking...

2009-09-10T13:32:00.005-05:00

FUCK

CANCER

This post is for Glenn
And next year, every penny that I donate anywhere will be for CANCER PREVENTION. And next year I will "Trash The Dress" in YOUR NAME. I just didn't think that this would be the year I would have been half wishing that I could

365 days straight?

2009-09-08T07:37:00.002-05:00

And I am going to try...

But quite honestly I am really that un-interesting :)

Actually, I am in my busiest season- coming out of a two wedding weekend and the work is piling up. So on top of keeping the baby happy and the house running- I have pictures galore to edit, the other blog to keep updated, sideshows to make, discs to burn and the list could go on and on. I also have another huge weekend coming up and a neighbour who's intentions for a public walkway beside my house has my writing skills directed in other places.

So if that isn't enough excuses :)

Have a wonderful day!

You know what bugs me...

2009-09-05T22:22:00.001-05:00

How everyone "smartens up" and drives so very nicely as soon as they see a police cruiser stopped at the side of the road. It's good to drive nicely- but when the same a-hole who was driving like a madman on my way home from my wedding today began to signal and lower his speed below the posted limit- uugh.

And I plead guilty- if I didn't admit there was a time that I have slowed and changed lanes to give them that extra space (to write a ticket!!) to someone they have pulled over I would be lying

It just bugs me is all.

A Strange New Fascination

2009-09-04T22:25:00.003-05:00

Have you seen it? Survivorman? If not I suggest it- sometimes it's a tad slow- it either puts me to sleep or keeps me awake- but either way, I am happy to be cozy and comfortable!

Fascinating!

Blink and the time is gone

2009-09-03T22:27:00.003-05:00

And one day they aren't singing about little stars-their favorite song is "Hey there Delilah" or some other hit list craptatic tune. And their faces aren't as round- their voices aren't as sweet. they start to know "more" things than you like the date or how to upload videos to YouTube :)

Fudgsicle Face

2009-09-01T21:08:00.005-05:00

Probably not the best thing for a little boy with milk allergies

But he stood in front of me (in his outlawed walker of course) in his absolute glory- giggling at the notion that he would be able to wrap his lips around another cold lick. His little arms flapping with the excitement (so much so that we feared he might fly away(-:)

My Mom calls it "de-sensitize"

Ryan calls it delicious!

A change is a coming....

2009-08-31T22:47:00.003-05:00

I have become increasingly displeased lately with aspects of my life.

And if I don't change it- no one will!

"Outlawed" Freedom

2009-08-30T11:59:00.000-05:00

Take away the whole chance of plummeting down a flight of stairs and the walker was a pretty good invention! Ryan couldn't be happier- we love it!

Oy!

2009-08-29T22:41:00.002-05:00

Hailey is going through a phase

At the ripe old age of 8 she doesn't like it when I leave the house- not for ANYTHING. My weddings are pretty traumatic for the little worry wart...she typically greets me on the deck, tears in her eyes and pushing out a half hearted cry at the notion that I am a half hour later than I said I was going to be at the end of a wedding.

Tonight she told me that she wondered if my "wedding people" didn't like me and decided to KILL me.

I told her not too worry- that's usually after they get their pictures back

7 minutes until tomorrow

2009-08-27T23:54:00.002-05:00

It's almost midnight...it was an evening like "that"

You know the kind where your baby pops up an hour after you put him to bed, your daughter is frustrated and grouchy because the picture she is drawing isn't working out, YouTube won't work and you have to finish backing up for your wedding this weekend?

So I won't have any time to post on this fine "baby wakin', grouchy daughter" evening

Good night all!

Pictures from a day at the kiddie pool

2009-08-26T22:36:00.002-05:00

Getting one in just before it's tomorrow!

2009-08-25T23:31:00.003-05:00

I think that bananas are making my baby constipated and crabby-

Google confirms that bananas can be "constipating"

Google seems to confirm everything

Even things that are seemingly untrue

Speaking of google, If I can leave you with one suggestion this evening. Do not google search "google images" for the following

-Yeast diaper rash

-Circumcision

-Vasectomies

-Any disfiguring disease you think yourself or your child may have

I have searched them all and have a hard time forgetting what the world of Google has enlightened me to.

Also, I have discovered that they seem to only show you the WORST CASE SCENARIOS. Don't believe me? Try it!

7 months

2009-08-24T14:58:00.004-05:00

And for some reason, I couldn't get him to crack a smile- he must not like this months hat! :)

He has 4 teeth and bow legs like his Dad

He rarely sleeps through the night

He likes when Hailey screams in his face (?)

He likes it when I sing Jason Mraz (I'm yours) to him it almost stops him in his tracks

After my wedding on Saturday, he let me kiss him and kiss him and kiss him

He is Ryan- a handful- but he's all mine

Wow

2009-08-23T21:09:00.003-05:00

If you ever wanted to appreciate everything you have for *this moment* then read this post

It seems so long ago that tragedy struck this family- I have been following her blog for a very long time.

Now go and hug your babies- or be a bit more forgiving to, or loving to....

Not that you cared... :)

2009-08-22T11:40:00.003-05:00

I can't live without spell check. It's like I don't even try to type the words correctly anymore. Spell Check has made me a lazy thinker. My emails before I send them off are FULL FULL FULL of mistakes. I often wish that facebook had a spell check when I update my status or write on some one's wall. And I almost always get the following words wrong

available

February

tomorrow

(all of which I can guarantee are fixed with blogger's spell check before this post is published)

Do I really have to post something?

2009-08-20T23:37:00.000-05:00

SOMETHING

Morning Look

2009-08-19T10:12:00.005-05:00

I love the look of babies in the morning.

Still a little slow

Definitely looking a little tired

Gums haven't been irritated from hours of gnawing

Happy

Now Ryan knows nothing about a crib except for that they are good to play in before his bedtime bath. Oh- and also that those "dancing bears" are pretty neat when someone winds them up. He wouldn't know, because he monopolizes the better part of a queen size bed. I already wake up with little feet in my face.

When I told him what cribs were really for, you can see the obvious look of bewilderment on his face "They actually make these for babies to sleep in?" he asked- only it sounded like mum mum mum...

Then he just blew some raspberries at the thought and asked for his bottle :)

Bugged

2009-08-18T22:59:00.002-05:00

Something is going on today inside my brain- I feel bugged, rather bogged down. Little things make my heart heavy. All day I have walked around with some awful feelings of guilt and anxiety. There are the big issues which would rightfully make someone feel like a weight was on their shoulders but when I realized that a matter of CD labels was weighing on my mind and causing me some internal angst I concluded that it's one of "those" days.

Here's to hoping that I will wake up tomorrow and all the problems of my world will be gone - or at least I won't feel so awful as I work through them

Day One- of the first day of a skinnier life :)

2009-08-17T22:25:00.002-05:00

Today is day one of a SERIOUS attempt at keeping junk out of my mouth. And despite the fact that we ate at a restaurant (for the first time as a family since Ryan was born), and we had a little ice cream cake to celebrate Jeff's birthday (are you thinking I have pathetically failed?) I think I have done okay.

When I normally would have picked up a snack during my visit to Superstore or eaten something bad despite *feeling* starved for dinner -I did not. I plan on being back to my pre-preggo weight by Christmas time so that I can slobbingly put some back on :)

I will keep you posted on the loss

Life with a baby

2009-08-16T22:28:00.003-05:00

*On a side note before I even begin to write- I remember being OVER JOYED when I could finally plunk Ryan in his bouncy chair, drag that chair into the bathroom and have a shower..."over-joyed"*

I tell people that I can't remember feeling this inconvenienced with Hailey in her early years. I honestly don't think that I was.

You see, I am one of those people who stops living when I have a baby. Unless I HAVE to do something (a session, a meeting, work) I do not leave and have a life. I have never had a sitter so that Jeff and I could go out. I have never had Jeff be a sitter so I could call up a friend and leave for an entire bedtime routine. It stinks really. I keep waiting for a time when I can feel comfortable leaving here again...and also a time when coming home feels just as good. Man this is hard work!!

I haven't slept though the night in about 9 months.... for the sure the 7 of Ryan's entire life...and even on those miraculous nights when he sleeps "like a baby" I have never. Some evenings I am so very exhausted- and crusty- and LOW.

My house is sub-par clean, I have 5 of the EXACT SAME black t-shirts that are practically the only thing that I feel comfortable in (a spare tire and 20 extra pounds keeps me there) and worse those over washed and fading black t-shirts, generally have some bit of baby puke or pablum (or more appropriately both) on the shoulders. I haven't made my bed in 7 months (or maybe we should call it Ryan's bed), yard work is only "kept up", I haven't watched an entire half hour episode of anything in one sitting and I answer customers emails in one sentence or worse- even point form. I shower *when I can* Eat *when i can* edit pictures, *when I can*.....

Don't get me wrong, I love my Ryan, my Hailey and I think this is okay....but I have yet to fall in love with the workload of late. I often say "next time" I promise to take a maternity leave....knowing full well that there wont be a time that I expect to be in this place again. I am not complaining, or venting- maybe just writing it like it is.

And I know I can't be the only one that feels like this.

And certainly things can't be that bad if I have time to write a blog post or have plans to paint the kitchen cupboards....

:-P

This posting for 365 sure is a drag

2009-08-15T22:35:00.004-05:00

I am much too tired to write a post or find a picture for this entry. These weddings sure do take a round outta me. Let's hope Ryan sleeps okay tonight and I can get a few solid chunks amidst his constant turning and tossing.

Good night!

Ryan loves Nana loves Ryan

2009-08-14T22:08:00.001-05:00

What could happen when you post photos on Facebook

2009-08-13T22:09:00.003-05:00

My niece added her own special touch to my seemingly plain photos on facebook

The best part about the last photo was her photo comment was *lol nice hair* Someone needs to tell that kid that we were in the late 80's and rockin' it! Although I am still baffled why I am wearing a side pone- like crimped hair wasn't enough!!?

Something about a Rainbow

2009-08-12T22:08:00.006-05:00

Tonight when my kids and I drove home from grocery shopping some big clouds had rolled into the city. After a VERY HOT day, rain would have been welcomed but other than a few sprinkles, these clouds just kinda hung. The way these clouds lingered were amazing- only hanging in the east, while the sun was beginning to set in the West- the entire sky was illuminated like a photo taken through a polarizing filter- the sky was almost an Azure blue. I felt like I was driving through a painting. To add to the colors, the setting sun against the darkness made every window in each high rise and every piece of metal on rooftops and store fronts sparkle....

And if you can believe, to top it off, there was a BRIGHT rainbow- make that a double rainbow that was one of the most vivid I had seen in a while- Hailey loved it.

We had one more stop to make and I am always amazed at who looks at a Rainbow....EVERYONE. Pre-teens, tweens, families and "thug looking" characters all stop and comment.

The novelty doesn't seem to escape anyone.

There's just something about a rainbow.

Two grubby kids on a patio swing

2009-08-11T22:49:00.002-05:00

One of about 50 test shots

2009-08-10T22:32:00.003-05:00

I am surprised he isn't blind by now :) Ignore the sleep in his eyes, his dirty little face and his dazed look.

From a lens that cost about 2 mortgage payments- blah

For almost 1800.00 I expected my photos to look like gold- what I got were about the same quality photos I accomplished with the lens a fraction of the price.

I hate keeping up with the Jones'es- although find myself disappointed that a purchase to do just that very thing, wasn't a miracle fix or even much of an improvement. I was excited! And now at the prospect of returning such an expensive piece of glass I am left feeling a bit empty. But alas how can a justify keeping it?

Decisions, Decisions-

Makemebabies.com- not exactly accurate

2009-08-09T21:01:00.003-05:00

You know what the funniest thing is, on the makemebabies website, they have this.....

Disclaimer: MakeBeBabies is rendering a unique baby face based on your facial features - but real life genetics is far more complicated than that. Use this site for your entertainment only.

No shit :)

5 Great Things About Today

2009-08-08T22:28:00.002-05:00

1. Despite the horrible weather forecast, IT DID NOT RAIN! When you are a wedding photographer, the absence of rain is a very important element :)

2. I got to sneak away this morning before any of my children were awake....that means I got to shower, dress and spruce up without changing a diaper or hearing Hailey "wish" I didn't have to do weddings :)

3. My bride today looked like she belonged on the cover or a bridal magazine- and that certainly makes a day a tad easier :)

4. I had my favorite soup for dinner (Thai- yes) and loved every bite of it.

5. Did I mention it didn't rain!!! :)

Missed Yesterday

2009-08-07T09:07:00.002-05:00

It flew by-
Actually I realized that my life is filled with too much lately

Too many photo sessions, too much editing, too many meetings, too much housework.

So I have decided-
To let some things go.

After I get through next weeks hectic schedule I am vowing to limit the amount of work that I will be taking. So I can make way for too much yard work, too much teething baby, too much Hailey and too much me.

We'll see how it works out!
:)

Phew!

2009-08-05T22:44:00.002-05:00

I almost forgot

Nothing to post- so here is this! :)

So much love that I HAD to share with the class

2009-08-04T11:04:00.004-05:00

Dear mommy.

I am Sorry I moved. But I cant live like This anymore Hopfully Il Live Some Wher else. Because this Time im DONE!

I HATE YOU all exsept Ryan I love Him Tell Him That you 2 ar Horrible Parents!

And then she proceeded to pack her belongings in birthday gift bags (yes paper birthday gift bags) :) and pretend to leave. When these bags could not be balanced on her bike handles, she loaded them in the wagon where they sat for an hour until she decided that the dragon flies scared her and home wasn't so bad after all!

Wow- I can't wait for the teenage years!

Douche-Bag Monday

2009-08-03T08:03:00.004-05:00

You know who really ticks me off?

The man (and I say man because assumption dictates that a woman would have a little more respect and tact) who decided that blasting circus tunes from a loud speaker atop his brightly (screaming bright) ice cream truck and driving slower than I can walk to areas that may have children was a good way to make a living.

And the worst part. Once they know there is at least one kid (which happens to be mine) who feverishly runs inside, practically running into walls, in attempt to clean out the silver from her piggy bank- they keep coming back. I have to tell Hailey to be careful not to get "hit" by the ice cream truck- since she losses all regard for safety. She is like a raging lunatic- just "needing" to get back out there "before it's too late"

Someone should tell her that the truck makes it his business to drive the s-l-ow-es-t it can.

Whatever happened to the guy on the bike with the bells? I could have more respect for that. Instead, while the kids pick their treats, the diesel fumes pump into the air (and of course that music keeps on a playing) blah. Which leaves me to ask, how that is this a living anyway? By the time that you pay for gas and product...how many Dora Ice cream treats do you have to sell to stay on top? (Which cost 2.50- Hailey knows the prices for the all the "good" stuff)

We're like fine wine :)

2009-08-02T22:18:00.006-05:00

Ten points if you can guess what the re-occurring theme seems to be in pictures Kenzie and I have together. And it's not my attempt at taking our picture (whether by timer or arms that aren't long enough (-:)

And then the sun came out

2009-08-01T22:13:00.003-05:00

A quick post with some pretty pictures of flowers at my most favorite venue, Pine Ridge Hollow. My day was awesome from start to finish- and although still unseasonably cool, for once in this last week there wasn't one drop of the wet stuff :)

And look Nicole!!! Our stationary- it looked fab (and everything matched!) I wanted to post this just for you cause' I know you will get a kick out of it as much as I did!

Drowning

2009-07-31T21:46:00.005-05:00

I would have loved to write more tonight and post more pictures of all my perennials in bloom- but I am afraid we are drowning here. It has been days of rain. I honestly DON'T HAVE A CLUE how on earth the people in Vancouver deal with this for sometimes months straight. It's bone chilling and dreary. I miss toiling around in the yard. We all miss swinging on the patio swing in the evenings.
The grass is lush- the gardens are thriving- it CAN STOP ANYTIME NOW especially for my wedding shoot tomorrow that takes place entirely outdoors.
The Eaves need repair and the downspouts are plugged but we can't do a thing until it stops raining!

Rain, Rain- Go Away!

Things I want to do before July 30, 2010

2009-07-30T22:01:00.004-05:00

-Spend a night away from home- BUT with no kids, no husbands and no home commitments. Just a few girls who also need to run away for a brief time. Preference would dictate that time away from home was in another city and in a nice hotel.

-Watch a pow-wow (yes a pow wow) and at night if possible.

-Learn how to make my own Hot and Sour soup (just like sukho Thai) and eat boatloads of it

-Re-connect with some old friends that I miss, and take a self timer pic with each of them (or I guess if someone agrees to take a shoulders up pose- I will let them (-:)

-Take more pics with my kids. I don't even have one of Ryan and I together.

-Plant Rhubarb in "Glenn's Garden" If anyone reading can spare a crown or two this fall I would love to take it off your hands.

-Take a trip to the West Coast

-Learn to be "nicer" For anyone who isn't my family, you may think I am a beam of sunshine- ha!. But I have work to do- do I ever. :)

A Most Certain Blast from the Past

2009-07-29T19:29:00.004-05:00

I can't even count the times that I have wished Ryan would take a soother in the last 6 months.

He thinks they are nice to chew on but has NOT ONE SHRED of interest in keeping one in his mouth.

Hailey had one until she was at least four! Yes Four! And I loved it- and she loved it and the world was at peace :)

Not this time "nuk". We have tried all sorts of shapes and sizes.

On the bright side, I won't be digging them out of the couch and searching a dark bed for one in the middle of the night.

Make a Wish

2009-07-28T16:43:00.005-05:00

I wish that I had the time and talent to properly express what I want to write about Glenn. Such a truly nice man- who truly touched our lives. "GG"(Grandpa Glenn) to Ryan- friend to Jeff and I, soul mate to my Mom...

But because I have tried to write paragraphs in my head for a week now,I will have to wait until I can find the right words- since he truly deserves it.

So what I wish-

I wish that Glenn didn't remind me so much of Christopher Reeve as Clark Kent in superman. A few evenings ago during one of Ryan's epic late night bottles, my favorite superman was on late night television. It was nearing the end and Superman had traded his spandex suit for his reporter duds. And I thought about Glenn- and then I was sad.

So perhaps I don't wish that he didn't remind me of Mr. Kent- I wish that one day there will be a time when remembering him doesn't make me feel this way. A time that I can remember him as Glenn or Clark :) and feel some peace and happiness just for having knew him.

Douche Bag Monday

2009-07-27T13:59:00.004-05:00

Ahhhh Jon Gosselin!

And at first I truly believed it was the other way around. The press had me fooled that he had broken loose from Kate's overbearing grip and wanted a life he could be happy with....

But as a wife and mother, I can see what's happening.

Jon gets some fame, Jon gets some money.

Jon decides that life of a father of 8 isn't so exciting. Jon wants to party, Jon wants to smoke and Jon wants the women that come with (for) those big dollars in his pocket. Because after all the poor baby had twins at 22 and sextuplets at 26- ahhhh poor thing. And life in his big ol' house, driving his new expensive car just isn't satisfying. He wants to hobnob with celebrities and date ultra young women. All the while (never keeping things tight lipped or secret) because heaven forbid his kids don't walk around in public with the stigma both his parents are working hard to weigh on their shoulders.

That's why he wins the award for Douche Bag of the week

1.8, 50 mm

2009-07-26T08:40:00.001-05:00

Amazing little lens, with superior depth of field (have a look at that background- completely, oblivious) and some pretty flowers to shoot

Totally worth the hundred and fifty smackers.

6 months

2009-07-25T08:04:00.001-05:00

Green Green Grass

2009-07-24T09:23:00.006-05:00

So now before my Mother jumps through the world wide web via a comment screaming "POISON" "CANCER CAUSING" and making reference to "CHEMICALS" and "SMELLS" I will certainly agree with all bold case captions. Hell, did I ever feel sorry for the young lad working his summer job who came to my door with an invoice reeking of fertilizers and weed treating chemicals....I wanted to grab him by the scruff of his "Eco-Green" uniform and tell him that he "should be wearing a mask!!"- but his barely 18 year old brain would have summed me up to being someone just like my Mom. So I handed him the check and closed my door promptly to escape the smells of the outdoors. Then I thought about calling Eco-Green and suggesting that they MAKE those young men wear masks. BUT THEN I had to stop myself from being just like my Mother- I have 24 years or so until I get to that level.

So why post about my lawn....despite references that Jeff has made about me going "Hank Hill" with my yard care I am both baffled and amazed. Since the 3.5 days that my lawn was sloppily sprayed (and if you have ever watched a lawn care company spray your lawn- it's sloppy- summed up to someone who doesn't care because they are making minimum wage and packing in as many houses as they can into the day- because THEY ARE making peanuts and packing as many houses as they can into a day) there has been some pretty "miraculous" changes.

How does the weed killer know? I watch the weeds dry up and die and yet the precious blades of grass take on a stronger appearance. And my lawn (especially the back) was almost a pure cornucopia of yard weeds. Yet this morning, as I inspected some new gardening, I couldn't help but notice that they are all disappearing. And the grass- although much more coarse than previous- looks good!

Which begs the question- is it worth my warning to Hailey to stay off that grass indefinitely, or at least until I am satisfied that enough rain has fallen to wash the chemicals away?

And have a look at this grass seed- the rain in combo with the fertilizer had made it sprout at an unbelievable pace. I am so torn
My mom says "Grass is over-rated" - but of course she does!

Forget a dog...

2009-07-23T21:33:00.003-05:00

I have a baby who can balance objects on his head

beat that Chuck :)

If you are a dreamer- come on in....

2009-07-01T09:21:00.001-05:00

If you are a dreamer- come on in....

I have never asked a soul what they think about before they go to sleep. Nor has anyone asked me the same. I have never told anyone this so why would I choose to reveal it now to strangers and non strangers alike?
I am a dreamer. Perhaps if I believed in the stars I could attribute it the fact that I am a Pisces. For as long as I remembered I have "day dreamed" before I fall off to sleep.
I have lived everywhere and had all sorts of dream jobs (and no job alike- the best dream job of them all (-:) California, Texas, Mississippi and countless others have all been my homes- money is a non issue because it flows freely. Vacations, expensive cars, cottages, boats- ahhh the life.
I have written books in my mind- some people read books- I have actually penned stories in my cranium that have never made it to paper...but a few have. Am I abnormal? I can't imagine sinking into bed each night and letting my mind focus on all the ups and downs of an ordinary life- how drab and frustrating that would be.

But last night was different. News came late, before bed. When someone has a terminal illness and news isn't positive it all but stops the day dreams. I laid in bed with a little boy and big girl surrounding me and tried to hold in the sadness I was feeling.

I realized how perfect yet how very imperfect the world that we live in is. How some things seem very fair and expected when there are so many unfair things are thrown in our direction. How minutes are precious and life is fragile. How very very sad events go hand in hand with very happy things.

And for the first night in a very long time that I can remember, I didn't imagine how things could be in a far away place. I thought exactly about the way things are in the now. And I was sad. An ordinary lady, in an ordinary house with extraordinarily sad feelings.

What's in your Garden?

2009-07-01T08:26:00.002-05:00

When I bought this property I have to acknowledge that I had absolutely NO IDEA how time consuming maintaining gardens could be. I think a lot lately about my cousin who keeps a spectacular blog about life on the island. She is a total green thumb and has some fantastic philosophies about what we should be growing in our gardens. I have to say that I completely agree. Gardens should be filled with food- imagine how much healthier we would be if only our annuals and perennials were replaced with food!
I wish I had the time, and feel like she would be disappointed if she saw the space devoted for flowers and bushes.

Perhaps next year, I may cut a few gardens for peas and beans....for now I have a small garden for tomatoes and may try my hand at some small fruit bushes. My gardens have ALL SORTS of perennials that I lack the knowledge to even name. Many which eventually bloom fantastic flowers.....and some that cover the ground and look pretty.

I will say that I DO know what this is! Practically the only thing edible in front of my house and wildly out of control. We refer to them as chives, although someone has called them spring onion. They look beautiful with their purple flowers that are short lived. But within one season they want to spread everywhere. It is a weekly project to "weed out" little babies coming everywhere!

There are lots of little ground covers that flower with little colorful flowers...they seem to spread easily and this morning my plan is to thin and move pieces to areas in the back yard that are too treed to properly grow much of anything

And this is a terrible picture, but there is also this....it grows close to the ground but is positively the most fantastic smelling stuff. In the spring when I rake the leaves from it I am in a divinely scented heaven. Spicy and sweet- If anyone could tell me what it is..?

And yes- I have ONE OF THESE- well who am I kidding- I have a few of them! :) I have far from the tackiest yard on the bay- but I wanted to contribute!

And of course, there's this- by far the easiest on the eyes. Grows like a weed and requires far more maintenance than the front and back yards combined. :)

Thursday Pet Peeves

2009-06-25T16:47:00.003-05:00

(But isn't ANY day a good day for a few peeves!)

-Women that DON'T WANT ANY DRUGS during labor

-White wedding dresses (I am terrible at photographing them!)

-Canker worms

-The way air conditioned air smells (at least in this house)

-Coffee that costs almost 3 bucks at Starbucks- what a waste of money! (Even though I certainly buy them)

-THE NANCY GRACE SHOW (my gawd if she calls another 4 year old child "a baby" in her southern accent, I think I might scream!)

-My stomach- which Jeff referred to as a "2 pack" last weekend

-Jeff (he's an ass)

-Facebook applications- I LIVE IN MANITOBA- I don't care where facebook thinks I should live :)

5 months

2009-06-24T19:25:00.001-05:00

How much water do you waste?

2009-06-17T14:32:00.002-05:00

Okay, so you may think I am strange or even stingy- but with the flowers that I have to keep watered and a hose that neither reaches properly to the sides of my front or back yards I started using a pail and watering can to do the job.

Then I noticed through the day how much water was literally running down the drain. You know the water as you wait for it to warm or the countless times you fill an empty coffee pot to rinse it.

So, it sounds cheaper as I write it, but I started using a small pail to collect it which I then in turn, pour into a big pail to take outdoors...

Would you believe I have enough water to keep the flowers in hanging planter, 4 window planters, 3 pots and one small flower garden twice daily!! Not to mention a small spruce pine which I have managed to keep soaked!!

I'm pretty proud or myself! ;)

Just another 30!

2009-06-08T21:55:00.003-05:00

So I was SUPPOSE to be backing up files when I started looking through all sorts of old pictures tonight. So now I am feeling all nostalgic and bubbly. Gosh I wish that I could look like I did in these pictures! It makes me regret the near full bag of marshmallows today!

Like in this picture- holy hottie..this was about the "fittest" I had been in my life. My arms were "sculpted" from my job in a dairy cooler where I constantly lifted jugs of milk...

Or here! Ignore the orangish hair- I am actually wearing white- my gawd I felt good enough to wear white!

Even here, I would take this back!

And last but not least, although it's scary, my dress was strapless and I wasn't even wearing a bra! Spillage was minimal and despite the dated flowers held by the bride, I think we looked pretty good. Or errr...the memories are good at least :) I say I need to loose another 20..but it's probably 30- uuugh :)

Rituals...

2009-06-05T10:46:00.003-05:00

Creature of habit?

I miss the LOOOONG dinners at Sukho Thai with Frieda The Painter- the tom yum, the mee-krob and the mat-saman- my goodness if I could have an evening I would eat my way to Thailand :)

I miss the pop-ins' and Kenzie's and the way I would doddle home after my meetings....ahh to have an evening again would be nice.

I miss long telephone conversations

I miss Thursday evening at Apple bees (granted that was about 7 years ago) but I am feeling nostalgic.

I miss naps during People's Court

BUT

I love slobbery wet cheeks that land on mine

I love the smell of freshly shampooed baby hair from the baby sleeping beside me

I love gurgles and spitting and raspberries that are blown through little perfect lips

I love how Hailey is in "love" too

AND

Of course, I LOOOOVE bedtime ;)

Balding for sure!!

2009-06-04T21:41:00.003-05:00

Certain Proof! It's more than I thought!

Rusty's Disappearing hairline

2009-05-27T22:27:00.003-05:00

I used to think it was Ryan's ever-growing head that was making his hair look thinner and thinner (after all, he was born with a tiny little head and now it's round and BIG) But while I bathed him this evening, I noticed a lot of his hair on the facecloth and even some on parts of him!

Oh well, at least he's too young to care- the next time his hair recedes, it will throw him into a midlife crisis

For now the only crisis he has is getting his entire fist into his mouth and having to settle for only a finger or two :)

Things to think about when you nauseated

2009-05-25T21:55:00.003-05:00

I was driving home from my Mom's house yesterday- tired and very nauseous and just happy that I was going to be able to jump into bed upon my arrival home.

Not sure why it popped into my memories, but I thought back to a time when I was an early teenager (probably about 14) Almost every Saturday, my Mom and I would head shopping somewhere in the morning.

So here we are in the garage getting ready to go- talking away, buckling up and my mom opens the overhead garage door and begins to pull out and CRUNCH....her car door was still wide open! My gawd, the poor woman pulled out of the garage (or attempted to) with the her car door open! Needless to say it was bent out of shape- we needed to TIE IT SHUT in order to drive to my uncles' so he could attempt to bend it back into shape. I don't think it was ever in any decent kind of working order after that. Funny thing is, I think we continued on to the mall directly after....

Okay, so the point of my story.

When I was 16 I pulled out from that same garage (doors closed (:) and under estimated my space. I accidentally pulled an antique chair with me and it broke into literally a million pieces as it scraped the tracks on my way out. Funny thing, I NEVER heard the end of it- for a solid set of years I was reminded of the chair that splintered into pieces and I was TERRIFIED to pull out of that garage eternally.

So yesterday I was thinking, how come at the time, I NEVER used that story as my defense- or at least to spread the shame? :) After all, what's an old chair in comparison to an ENTIRE car door? :)

Proof that you do get smarter with age, or at least a little more vindictive!

4 months

2009-05-21T21:44:00.003-05:00

Happiness is....

2009-05-20T10:12:00.002-05:00

Is it just me....

2009-05-15T08:56:00.002-05:00

You know I was thinking, is it just me, or is it just extremists that try to push their views on other people? Or is it a tactful thing...A maturity thing?

For instance, I believe the circumcision is a good thing....but I HAVE never told someone that "They SHOULD circumcise their infant"
Why does someone who doesn't believe it's a good option for them go ahead and rally against it. I heard plenty of opinions that were different from mine when the decision was in my hands

I don't think that a photographer should make as much as a doctor...but I HAVE NEVER emailed someone to tell them that "I thought their price was too high"
When yet I need two hands to count emails I received telling me just that (only the opposite)

I think vaccinations are important. Maybe not flawed- BUT IMPORTANT and yesterday while doing research I found just despicable message boards that typically had the non- vaccinaters up in arms and making REALLY uninformed comments to get their point across. Does it really bother these people SO MUCH that they need to make sure that their VIEW IS THE ONLY RIGHT ONE.

I don't know if maybe I am a bit more laid back, and think that everyone is entitled to an opinion and way of doing things that suits them but I am so tired of hearing opinions or being ridiculed in one form or another of the way I choose to do things.

No one respects a radical pro-lifer except for a radical pro- lifer
I don't so much believe in abortion but you would never see me dress up my children in signs and have them parade on the streets....

Not sure if I like the use of fetal stem cells but I realize that if I wanted to have my opinion recognized the best idea wouldn't be a bully and tell someone who is paralyzed or sick waiting for the research that it was wrong... There is something to be said for someone who doesn't feel the need to approach a topic with sensitivity and maturity.

An opinion is just that. Two people will never agree on everything, but certainly there is always a mature way to get an opinion heard?

3 Months

2009-04-23T12:02:00.003-05:00

Sign

2009-04-22T18:49:00.002-05:00

So I am driving to the furniture store in my father in laws truck with Hailey

The seats are covered with dog hair and it's smelly (like a dirty dog). The radio, only seems to scan in 97.5 on the FM - but that's neither here nor there since my father in law only listens to the AM stations.

So here we are, the traffic is yucky, the truck is smelly and hairy and we only have Power 97....
So Guns and Roses are playing...the song Patience is just starting and so to be funny I pretend to dramatically whistle and make eyes towards Hailey who is trying not to sit back onto the hairy seat.

She belts out a big laugh...I am thinking I am pretty funny

"You actually know this song..." She thinks it's ancient

Then I realize
I am old

Food For Thought

2009-04-22T07:42:00.006-05:00

It hit me last night as I pulled onto my quaint little bay with my 2 dollars worth of Starbucks how gluttonous we are in this country.

Our ordered pizza can't come quick enough, our donuts (fired in hydrogenated poison) HAVE to be fresh, the lines at the buffet are sometimes TOO long, we throw out good food daily and the list goes on.

There are people starving out there...sounds like a cliche....but seriously. And all the while we sit here in and prosper and eat ourselves into Cancer and Diabetes and god knows what. And we eat processed meals that are filled with chemicals and vegetables that have been genetically mutated to be bigger and juicier

And we wonder why there is so much Autism....and we wonder why Cancer is so abundant....

And I am just a product of the gluttony...give me the donuts, where is that pizza?, "I'm starving" Almost like a beast without control- It's what I know, and what I (we) have become.

Mission

2009-04-17T13:09:00.005-05:00

Turn a former "studio" turned "den" turned lonely "unused nursery" into a room that was ultra cool and "teenagerish" as per request of Hailey.

The room is awkward, so not so easy to photograph- even with the wide angle.

The after....

Have a look at this purple carpet- the most expensive carpet I have purchased- but well worth it- and it's as soft as a cloud!

My Dad replaced one of the built in's with a desk top to save space and made and installed a shelf for the tv to go up onto the wall by the foot of the bed- it's starting to come together!

There are a lot of finishing touches that I have planned- but with a lil' baby and my return to weddings tomorrow for just about every weekend this season, I am afraid that my posting time may be limited. I wanted to get a post in before the work begins!

What in the World?

2009-04-15T10:50:00.002-05:00

Has hell frozen over? What kind of world has this become when a left wing atheist such as myself has so much love for the right winged bible loving Duggars?

I love the Duggars!

I REALLY love the Duggars

Excuse while I go and wash my mind out with soap now :)

Just a Big Ol' Baby asleep on the couch

2009-04-15T10:37:00.004-05:00

I am convinced that my Mom, could even put an angry giant to sleep as she managed to get "the baby who never sleeps" to have a big long nap on the couch in the sunlight...

I don't much update about Ryan anymore- I feel a bit like I would "jinx" the progress that he has made. We will just say that he has thus far doubled his birth weight and jumped up in the percentiles 30% since his diet of ultra super duper expensive formula. After the first formula failed, the next step up (at a price tag of 70.00 a week) seems to be working well. The next alternative was double that price- so I will take it.

He looks EXACTLY like Hailey did when she was a babe- he is even growing little red eyelashes that I presume will be just her length. He seems much more eager to communicate than she did though. I am going to guess he will be talking early...

And good gawd, I go back to work this weekend for what seems like FOREVER weddings....gotta support that formula habit of Ryan's

"no more pictures please"

Touched

2009-04-14T07:40:00.004-05:00

http://georgialucaswpg.blogspot.com/

Hug your babies- big and little- appreciate every minute you have with them. Life is precious.

Thank you Tanya for posting this link- my hearts go out to the family and Georgia

Remote Control Hog In Training

2009-04-11T21:49:00.001-05:00

Things I want to remember (take 2)

2009-04-10T22:03:00.004-05:00

The way your hands look when you are sleeping. Since we are "bed mates" (oh the joy :) I often stare at you when you are asleep

I love the way your thumbs are always tucked in between your"peter pointer" and middle finger like you are playing a game of GOT YOUR NOSE.

Sometimes I smell your hands when you are asleep- mostly because they smell like you and I don't want to get to close (by chance to wake you)

And I also like the way you throw a fit in the middle of the night when I try to change your diaper before your bottle, the way your little legs kick and you frantically move your mouth like you haven't eaten in a century....it's one of the only newborn baby things you seem to still do and the days pass quickly.

To think...next thing you know, I will blink, and you will be 7 years old and monopolizing my computer.

Happy

2009-04-10T21:47:00.000-05:00

Watcha doing back there?

2009-04-10T21:45:00.001-05:00

Hey Miss...Why so Serious?

2009-04-10T21:41:00.003-05:00

Going Red

2009-04-06T21:08:00.003-05:00

Both my babies were born with very dark brown hair. An odd color brown, almost like it was dyed with a cheap boxed dye- not a pinch of shimmer- not one hair highlighted with another color.

No one believed me seven plus years ago when I swore that Hailey's hair was coming in blond- and did it! It's hard to believe her hair was once a mop of brown/black and at the age of one she had "reverse-roots" :)

I can see Ryan's new color coming in now...so via some window light I wanted to prove it. It looks like it isn't going to be the blond I thought it would be....but I always liked red-heads :)

And someone tell me....Does it not look like whoever was in charge of the eye color machine mixed up some of the settings when they decided on Hailey's eyes?

The Sleeper Says it All

2009-03-26T17:32:00.002-05:00

No tired eyes on this kid- EVER!

Blue

2009-03-25T16:01:00.002-05:00

The mood that lingers.

I have been a tad bit blue. Out of sorts really, knowing that one day things will seem normal but for now longing for the previous freedom that I had. I am reaching for some kind of happy medium but yet can't get there (or won't allow myself to?)

This mood has left me in a odd head space- forgiving for things I shouldn't be- mad at things that I shouldn't be either. I feel overwhelmed by the responsibility and grasp for a "schedule"

If you are my friend, I will be back (not literally)- I haven't left, it will just take me a while to get to where I need to be. Phone calls , visits and emails take a second place along with showers and non-interrupted suppers.

Oh my

2 months

2009-03-25T12:29:00.002-05:00

Things I want to remember

2009-03-25T10:30:00.003-05:00

With Hailey, I had a pink frilly 1st year calendar that hung on the wall. And at each milestone there was a sticker and room to write on each day the new wonderful things that happened.

With Ryan- Nada

I have forgotten so many things already. But because I have blogged for YEARS now and look back at Hailey in this blog as she grew, I thought I should write down some "Ryan" things that I want to remember.

*You first smiled on February 28th, we were all here to see it. You actually smiled twice on that day, and the second time it was at Hailey and the biggest first (second) smile you could imagine.

You reached this milestone much earlier than Hailey ever did.

*You try SO HARD to talk. You are very impressed when you make a noise that sounds like talking. You are SO YOUNG but so smart already!

*You are NEVER a very still baby but when you eat, it's the only time you are motionless. I want to remember that when you have your bottle you ALWAYS move your left foot back and fourth and it rubs against me.

* I want to remember the smell right between your nose and your mouth. I love it. It smells like butter that is left overnight in the bottom of the popcorn bowl- it's the only way I can describe it. Gross really, but because I'm your Mom, I love it!

*I love the feeling of your fuzzy hair on my cheek- it's the baby kind of fuzzy that I know won't last- so I will take every rub I can get!

Maybe I will get you a calender, but if not, it's right here!

Smiley Guy

2009-03-14T08:04:00.004-05:00

New Plan

2009-03-13T07:19:00.002-05:00

Get my head back into the game

I can do this

I chose to have a baby and to still work. I choose two photo sessions a week and consultations. I choose to try to keep everything perfect. Time to buck up and step up to the plate.

Certainly having a sick baby is hard- but there are people who have sicker and survive- no make that thrive.

I can do this

Time to throw the "text books" out the window. Time to use my instinct and do what I think is right- no more stuck on 3 hours in between a feeding and exactly how much.

Like Tina, it's time to have a mission....and to get done what can be done and to re-evaluate when things can't be done.

I can do this